I’m in a new role which (in my small industry) means I’m running across a whole lot of people that I last saw 5-10 years ago. I’m constantly having to remind myself that just because they weren’t particularly helpful/good/on top of things (insert negative adjective here) doesn’t mean that they aren’t now. In fact, some/ many of them have proved to be very impressive with the passage of time. One I saw at a meeting today was very earnest, junior and prone to repeating his bosses (fairly inane) comments 8 years ago. Now he’s making constructive suggestions that bring the meeting back into usefulness.
My reminder to myself about keeping an open mind usually comes with a simultaneous internal reminder of what I was like, professionally, 5-10 years ago and a hope that their memory is less vivid than mine.
Openness to this kind of reflection is incredibly powerful. Having been something of a ‘hater’ and quick to judge in the past, I’ve eventually managed to pick up some skills that enable me to put a sock in it and just let things evolve. It’s worked with people I’ve had trouble with in the past: can now appreciate their good points and be fair but assertive about behaviour I still think inapproproiate.